Posted by: toddzilla | December 21, 2007

Ch-Ch-Ch-Ch-Changes…

That is what Daddy does now.  Change diapers like it was my job.  Well, it has become my job unofficially and to be honest…surreptitiously (how’s that for some wordery-…ness).  Mama inputs and Daddy takes care of the output.  Now God has some great and wonderful designs that I have noticed in his creation.  One of which is the fact that newborn poo…(not the first black tar-esque meconium poo, the rest)…well newborn poo is a lot like chocolate pudding in color and consistency and…it doesn’t stink!  This must be the Lord’s way of enticing daddy’s to change diapers by slowly easing them into the duty (I said “duty” tee-hee).  Well, the chocolate pudding days are far gone.  We have moved into the (squeamish readers look away…now) liquid, smelly, mustard infused with seedy…kinda…stuff poo.  Man, does it stink.  Errr….I mean it is pungent.  So, there is no doubt when said poo has occured.  As of this morning, Daddy and mommy have both been pooed on.  Myself, twice…Ma once.  Please forgive the frankness of this post, but you know I ain’t about to dance around the issues…the real issues…When I got pooed upon …it was like a shotgun blast!  I got nailed.  High velocity dinner meet new father.  Needless to say, there has been more than a few laundry loads for both parties.

So, yeah, I’m like a diaper ninja now.  It’s not a pleasant job by any means, but you know it has to be done.  It’s not like I can feed her now, can I?  So, I manage output.  I’m the output manager.  When she poos it…I removes it.  If she stains it…I maintains it.  Did something go splatty?  Give it to Daddy!  Okay, that’s more than enough.  I have set my sights on higher things, like trying to set new speed records and maybe even a one-handed attempt.  I’ll let you know how it goes.

The joys of fatherhood…and I’m loving it all.

A quick update-Lil’ Layla has put on 12 ounces in one week!  That’s 3/4 a pound!  Holy cow!  She is doing great and we have a lot of fun.  By fun, I mean, she stares at me like I’m an idiot while I make silly noises. We’re getting 3-4 hours of sleep at a time overnight and we’re hanging in there!

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Responses

  1. This video is perfect for you: http://youtube.com/watch?v=pnIk0npINiE

    I’m glad things are going well. I think changing diapers scares me the most about having a kid – one day.

  2. I’ve witnessed Todd’s diaper-changing abilities, and he is a pro! Layla is a lucky little lady to have you for diaper duty. And she is cute cute cute!!

  3. Yeah for Output management! You are awesome!


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