Posted by: toddzilla | November 27, 2007

Swaddlin’ and Waddlin’

I apologize for taking so long between posts here at the ‘Zilla.  It’s getting to be crunch time and we’ve been busy taking care of a few last minute details (as if we could actually have everything lined up as needed…but we can try).  Everything looked fine at the last Doc’s appointment and, dang…I just realized I haven’t even written since we had our second ultrasound!  Well, Junior looks good (like his/her Daddy), size is good and the head is right where it needs to be (not the most pleasant of places, but practical, nonetheless).  We got to see the heart and, man, it was pumping!  On the first ultrasound it looked kinda like a four-square court with the lines jiggling and wiggling with each pump…This time it looked like the old World War I era “Potato-digger” machine guns (if any of you actually know what that means, then congratulations, you are a nerd like me).  Basically, the heart (for reasons beyond my feeble comprehension, looked like it was a swinging pendulum with each beat.  But it looked good to me!  I guess it was a wall-like muscle of some sort acting like a diaphragm pump.  Everything looked good and Cheryl is doing fine.  She is in the tired phase.  Sure, she’s been experiencing new forms of “tiredness” all along, but I think she’s in the phase where it sneaks up on her and I’m trying my best to get her to slow down.  What else has been going down?  Does my title enthrall you?  Well, click on “more” to find out…um…more(?)

Waddling-I just realized (because my mind constantly wanders looking for new things that I can used to cram stuff into categories), that we, apparently use body motions to subconsciously identify others.  Case in point, I was waiting at the mall for my lovely wife to use the restroom (this has been occurring a lot lately…for some reason) and she walked (within a small group of people) to within a few feet of me, while I was watching without me realizing it.  I had seen her, but didn’t note it as being her because she was….get this…waddling!  I gotta admit it, even though she doesn’t believe me, but she is a cute waddler!  I’m digging it and I think I will actually miss the belly.  Cheryl has a way of not believing me when I compliment her and she continues this disbelief until a female notes the same thing.  I dunno why.

Swaddling-The ancient, mystic art of swaddling is back!  That is if you read “The Happiest Baby on the Block”.  I am trying to be the daggone “Grasshopper” of swaddling…the High Priest of Jive-Swaddling…the Grand Poobah of Swaddling!  Sure, after reading the book, it sounds good and we have friends that have attested to its effectiveness (especially on collicky babies) so, I’m hoping ot hone my swaddling skills.  How do I do this you may ask???  Go ahead and ask…Well!  I’m glad you asked!  I broke out one of Cheryl’s old Cabbage Patch Kids which looks like a boy with brown and white carpeting on its head.  I couldn’t quite figure it out until Cheryl explained that it was some sort of Cabbage Patch Kid/Pets spinoff (undoubtedly the bastard child of a big brand name and dwindling sales…kinda like the last Cosby kid…what was her name?  Rudy’s smaller sister…) anyway, this one was a boy/cat(?) and Cheryl named it Clyde the cat.  Yeah.  I’m in charge of naming Junior.  Clyde the cat was, however, the yellow and red cat from the old Looney Tunes cartoons where the mice trick him into thinking the house is upside down so he keeps guzzling nerve tonic and sleeping pills (labeled “Take ‘dese and doze”…priceless!) so they can raid the cheese.  “Oh yeah Louie…a laugh ri-ot!  Yeah, yeah sure, sure”. Anyhoo- I digress.  So, I grabbed “Clyde” and a swaddling blanket and proceeded to, well, swaddle.  You gotta get that mess tight, son!  I think we got it fairly well after a few tries.  I even tried to swaddle Cheryl in a quilt, but she ended up looking like an overstuffed burrito and I started craving Mexican food.  Coem to think of it, she looked like a patchwork python had swallowed a beach ball.  It remains to be seen how well we can manage this feat of ancient wisdom on a wiggling, crying baby.

Well, that’s if for now.  Sorry for the long time between posts and as always…thanks for reading!


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